For some reason, I decided tonight to watch the documentary “Jesus Camp” tonight. I think I understand my childhood better now.
The culture of modern American Evangelical Christianity as it is presented in this documentary is so focused on behavior: “do this” “don’t do that”. Avoid sin; “simmer in the holy ghost”. It’s not focused on teaching principles or addressing life’s most difficult questions or even on truly on the gospel and despite how many times they say God’s name or “Jesus,” there is no sign of actual pursuit of a relationship with God. There’s discussion of “be[ing] a man of prayer” and “go[ing] for God” but no practice of it. The whole film is a painful portrayal of how I feel my childhood went.
A healthy relationship is one where two independent people just make a deal that they will help make the other person the best version of themselves.
An expertly done three point turn
Weren’t expecting that house
#our house #in the middle of the street
So, while trying to think of a story to send to Shane for kicks and giggles, this little story came out. o_oU
Once upon a time there was a snail. This snail was brightly colored and her name was Sarah. Sarah was sliming her way across the front porch when a large, black, wet nose snuffled at her followed by a growl. She hid inside her rainbow shell and said, “don’t eat me! I’m too pretty to die!”
The dog sat back on its haunches and growled again. “you look pretty plain to me,” he said. Dogs are colorblind and he couldn’t see how pretty she was.
Sarah poked an antenna out of her shell and squeaked up at him, “just because you can’t see it, doesn’t mean it’s not there.” And with that, she set off across the porch.
The dog snuffled and growled at her again, but let her go and padded away.
So after all of it, the middle school length relationship and crying myself to sleep again, I’m deciding to be okay. I have good friends whom I love. I have a good family who wants to be there to support me, even if we don’t communicate that well to each other. I will graduate in just over a month if I can pass all of my classes and do well. I am smart, attractive, and brave. I chose not to hide who I am, and I was genuine and accepted. I make beautiful art, and I don’t feel a deep-seated need to throw myself off the top of the parking garage anymore. Yeah, being broken up with really sucks, and being single again is NOT what I wanted, but I’m still me and “me” is still good enough on her lonesome. :)
they’re so adorable!
was voldemort a virgin
Imagine being the chick to do the frick frack with the Dark Lord Voldy.
TUMBLR DOT COM: WHERE WE CAN DISCUSS HAVING SEX WITH VOLDEMORT BUT WE CAN’T ACTUALLY SAY THE WORD SEX
doing the do with you know who
man, even voldemort has gotten more action that I have. LAWL.
no one should scroll past this
If you scroll past this i have no respect for you.
it has now been five days of spending all hours with Ryan, and I have received precisely one kiss. It was last night, as I was walking out the door, trying not to stare at him expectantly like I usually do, so I kissed him on the cheek, and he leaned in to kiss me on the forehead, and I wasn’t sure what he wanted, and he kissed me ever so briefly on the mouth, and then I spun on my heel, and got the fuck out. No such luck tonight.
I don’t know what to do. I’m trying to respect his wishes, but it’s making me very unhappy in the process. I don’t like our dynamic. I don’t like our interaction, because I feel like he only wants to be friends, but he wants me to be exclusively friends… so we’re dating, but we’re not being intimate in any sense of the word.. I’m not really understanding what, in his mind, distinguishes our relationship from any other.
I just want him to want me, you know? Is that too terribly much to ask? I even complained to my mother about it. What do I even do?
do you ever just think about someone and immediately get really happy because their mere existence is a source of joy to you
all the time, my dear, all the time.
this shirt would fit if it weren’t for boobs: a tragedy
that shirt would fit if i had boobs: the sequel
this shirt fits perfectly because my boobs are the right size: the fanfiction
my shirts always fit: a man’s tale
why can’t I just be shirtless?: a tale of social injustice
Where did my shirt go?: the mystery
this. this is what I want. right here. always. to be ridiculously and hopelessly smitten with one another. is that so much to ask?
I think about sex and life. About conversations that have happened and ones that haven’t. I think about the places that I wish I was at in life. And I think about the people whom I wish I was with right at that moment.
Art creds to: liquidsouldesign on deviantart
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